further farther father

Further on fathers and family and LALA

There is more clarity now on my father’s situation. It appears he suffered a massive blood infection from a tennis injury, which caused severe delirium. For about 4-5 days it was unclear if he would survive. The physical news has taken a huge upturn since then. He is able to take care of his basic functions, is in a very good private room in the geriatric ward and has constant vigil from my mother and sister. I will be traveling up there on August 8 to spell my sister off for a much needed rest, and the big decision at this point is whether or not he will come back to my folks beautiful but very stair-heavy Victorian, or whether they will move into a floor through or some kind of assisted living.

I cannot do justice to the massive soul searching something like this spurs. There were days I felt literally crippled and was seconds away from booking a plane up there. However, as things cleared up and immediate mortal danger passed, I was able to bring myself around to LA and the show and the LA family.

Carla and Mac were also deeply affected, and I strongly implored Carla to maintain focus on her show and the incredible opportunity it was for her career. She has done so and has worked profoundly hard at making things happen. Now some exceptional things have happened for her and do not be surprised if you hear a lot more about her in the coming year. I can’t go into detail on this blog, but suffice to say that some very influential people in the “business” think she is astounding and…well that’s all I will say for now. She richly deserves it and I am glad I was able to be a part of making it happen.

I will be honest that my wife and I usually have pretty different rhythms. I have often joked that she puts the A in type A, whereas I am much more the stop and smell the roses, walk along the ocean kind of person. Now, it makes all the sense in the world that she is running frantically, because she is pursuing something she loves with all abandon, and that makes sense to me. It has also made it very clear to me that I should be pursuing what I love, and I will be making the changes necessary for that to happen. Among the results of that is you, dear readers, will be seeing more of me on the scene as a player. I shifted focus from that when we moved out to the Bay from NYC, dedicating myself front and center to family, and now it is time to shift focus back towards my dreams and desires.

I cannot say how the trip to see my father will affect me, but it is necessary for to see for myself how he is and let him know I love him.

Lastly, LA is a pretty cool place in many ways, with far more of a nightlife and cultural diversity than in the Bay. Yes, there is a large quotient of vapidity and narcissism here, but there are ways and byways of fascination, and the most powerful lesson have drawn from being here is that it is what you are doing and who you are with that makes the place. If I am living in Chicago, playing great music with people I love around me, it beats Maui with neither of those. I draw the line at Cleveland or Dallas;=}